The Apple of His Eye
God has used a variety of methods to speak to me. The main method is the Bible, which is the first place I will go to seek Him. There I find messages of love, correction, encouragement, hope, and so much more. God also speaks to me through other means like songs, sermons, and the stories of other believers. He is always unique in how He chooses to send me a message. There are even times when God uses my children to speak to me.
I have three daughters and they are my hope and joy! They each have their own personalities, but are all silly, quirky, and fun! My two older girls are very even-tempered. They generally don’t throw tantrums, and are easily comforted. If they are having a bad day, it doesn’t take very much to console them. My youngest, on the other hand, is quite the opposite. She was the one who introduced me to tantrums. This little one keeps me on my toes, and I am always looking for creative ways to calm her when she is throwing a fit. Though she can be hard to handle at times, I love and enjoy her as much as the other two. She makes me laugh and often surprises me with how much she knows. My little one is three, yet she knows what she wants and is very demanding. She isn’t a horrible child (similar to most I’d say); just very different than the experience I had with my other girls. Even as a baby, she displayed a different demeanor than they did. Her insistent and trying traits were visible very early on.
When she was 15-months old, there was a time in which she was extremely irritable, even inconsolable at times. It lasted only about a week, but her fits were excessive and intense. They would include crying, screaming, arching her back, and throwing herself all over the place. In my attempts to comfort her, I’d wrap my arms around her and calmly tell her that I loved her. I’d hold her, rock her, sing to her, and give her hugs. I held her upright, laid her down, gave her toys, fed her, massaged her, gave her a bath, and more; yet, nothing worked very long.
I wanted so much for her to feel loved, happy, and secure. No matter what I tried, she still was not comforted, then I got a sense that she didn’t fully understand how much I loved her. I asked myself what what else I could do to let her know that she was safe. To what extent could I display my love for her? What would calm her? I wanted so much for her to know that she was the apple of my eye, and that I would never leave or harm her.
After pondering these questions, the Lord spoke to my heart. He showed me that I am much like her. I worry, complain, and even doubt Him at times. When He’s holding me, I squirm, fight, and resist Him. I don’t sit still and let Him comfort me. He showed me that there are even some areas in which I don’t fully trust Him, and that I don’t fully understand His unconditional love for me. Though He has been my Provider, I still question His methods over and over again. Next, He reminded me of a verse in Matthew 7:11 says so if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him. He asked me how much I loved my three girls, and then told me that He loves me even more. His love is unconditional and perfect, and sees me as the apples of His eye. When I looked up apple of His eye, I found this verse in Deuteronomy 32:10. It says:
He found him in a desert land And in the wasteland, a howling wilderness; He encircled him, He instructed him, He kept him as the apple of His eye.
His truth was so profound and eye opening. God spoke directly to my heart, and couldn’t be more right! So many times, we forget God’s love. We don’t fully trust Him or believe He has our best interests in mind. We question His goodness, and doubt that He will keep us safe. Though God has proven himself faithful time and time again; we easily forget all the things He has done for us. When we distressed, we can’t sit still long enough for God to comfort and console us. We squirm in His embrace, and resist His attempt(s) to relieve us.
Some of us do not know how to accept His love or embrace. People have done and said things to hurt us, making it a struggle to trust Him. We are afraid to be vulnerable and want to protect ourselves from getting any more hurt. Except that with God, it is safe to be vulnerable. I encourage you to let the Lord love you. Let Him heal you and speak truth into your life. God is the God who redeems, restores, and revives. He wants to help you: to love you, show you mercy, give you grace, and forgive you. You are the apple of His eye!
Let us pray.
Heavenly Father,
I thank you for Your message. Thank You for loving me, and for all the ways that you speak to me, to give me encouragement, correction, and love when I need it most. I am sorry that I fight with You, or resist You when You try to comfort or console me, forgive me Father.
I also want to thank You for showing me how much I am like my daughter. I throw tantrums and fits when things don’t go the way I want. Yet, You are patience. Thank You for Your unconditional love, mercy, forgiveness, and grace. Teach me how to be still and to rest in Your embrace.
Thank You for showing me that I am the apple of Your eye, and that You will never leave me. Your Words, comfort, and kindness warm my heart. I praise You Father God. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Prayerfully,
Pam
