Anger

I used to be very short-tempered and can still be very hot-tempered some days. On a scale of 0 being no anger, and 10 being full fledged anger, I can go from 0-10 in a matter of seconds. Some things that make me angry is when people say or do hurtful/offensive things about me, or to those I care about; my kids being too loud/noisy, or things like injustice, racism and ignorance. I've gotten angry enough that I'm well aware of the warning signs my body expresses when I am getting angry. I literally feel the anger bubbling and rising up within me. My heart starts to pound, my body gets tense, my jaw is clenched, and my head is just blaring with raging thoughts and responses. Does this sound like anything you've ever experienced? Well, I've learned (with God's help) that although we may not be able to control our anger, but we can control what we do or say. The Bible says, be angry but do not sin (Ephesians 4:26). So we ought to not do things to make the situation worse. We have the ability to not react or retaliate. It's hard at first, but it can be done if we let God lead us. I've had to learn to let things go, bite my tongue, ignore the offenses, and turn the other cheek (Matthew 5:39).

In doing this, my marriage has gotten so much better; God has helped me to become more even-tempered. Yes, at first I strongly felt that my husband was the cause of all of our marital problems. That was until God showed me all the things I needed to change. (I'll share more about this in another blog.) I'll give you an example, do you remember the saying If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all? Well, I pretty much live by that verse now; I usually don't say anything if it isn't nice. But I can't always bite my tongue. Sometimes a reply is required and Proverbs 15:1 says a soft reply turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. I've notice that God's Word is very effective in my marriage and that a soft reply always has a better outcome that a condescending or harsh reply. For instance, if my husband asks, "Did you do the dishes?" I could say, "Yeah, duh!" or I could answer, "Yes I did honey". If I didn't do them I could say, "No, why don't you do it?!" or reply "No, I didn't have time, but I will do them now." Which response would you rather have?

Also, Ecclesiastes 7:21-22 says Do not take to heart all the things that people say, lest you hear your servant cursing you. Your heart knows that many times you yourself have cursed others. Wow, this can be hard to swallow but it's so true. How can we be so offended by what others say when we ourselves have said hurtful things? I used to (and still do sometimes) think that it would feel so much better to retaliate, but the more God works in me, the more conviction and correction I feel. If you're following Christ, pretty soon your witty, hurtful comebacks won't feel as great as it once did (it might at first), and the remorse you feel is much worse. If you struggle with anger, ask God to help. I learned that no one wants to be around an angry, negative, begrudged person, and I am happy that I am not as angry as I once was. Being angry really is no fun; it's miserable.

Anger is not always bad though; it is a God-given emotion. We see God getting angry many times in the Bible. However, God's anger is always justified because He is righteous in all his ways (Psalm 145:17) and Holy. God is perfect and we all sin. Our sins can make God angry, but He is very kind, merciful, and forgiving. So if you are angry because children are being sold in slavery, or because people are starving--that is a just cause. Don't use your anger to complain or badmouth people, use the anger to fuel your passion and do something to support the cause. You can make a difference. I also encourage you to pray about it first. Pray about what makes you angry and see what God reveals to you.

Let's Pray.

Heavenly Father, our one true God,

I am so thankful to you for these readers, all those who have subscribed and those who give their time to read about the life lessons that you have taught me. I pray that You will work in them as you have me. Open their eyes to the anger they have and help them to effectively deal and cope with their anger. We all express anger in different ways and know that anger is a God-given emotion. Different things may cause us to be angry, but show us how to not sin when we are angry. Show us when we ought to bite our tongue, let things go, or turn the other cheek. Help us to fuel our anger for Your purposes and to advance your Kingdom. Let Your Will be done in our lives.

In Jesus Holy Name, Amen.

Prayerfully,

Pam